★ ★ ★ ★ ★
The American Way
™
A Step-by-Step Guide to Poisoning Thanksgiving
🌲
"We know better than Indigenous peoples"
↓
🔥
*Creates megafires*
↓
🧪
"We invented forever chemicals!"
↓
☠️
*Poisons everything forever*
↓
📊
"Let's study how many people are dying"
↓
💰
"Actually, let's not"
↓
🗑️
*Retracts study*
↓
🦃
"Happy Thanksgiving!"
↓
🤷
"Why is everyone sick?"
This is not a system.
It's a
Rube Goldberg machine
of consequences.